Post by destiny on May 13, 2010 21:23:22 GMT -6
don't bring around a cloud to rain on my parade
she was about ready to give up on it all. was the stress really worth it in the end? there was no one around to answer her, of course, for who else besides penny archer would be outside in weather like this with an umbrella, standing underneath a pine tree to help shelter her further from the wind and rain that came crashing through the park that night. she had been unable to sleep amidst all of the thoughts that were collecting in her mind, and so had quickly dressed herself, bundled up in a coat and grabbed an umbrella before she headed down toward the park and the thunderstorm that had come rolling in a few hours before. it was typical, she thought to herself on the walk to the park. she had always loved thunderstorms as a kid, and now she was able to walk out into them without having to listen to her mother's frantic screams for her to come back inside.
she kind of missed that.
that was the problem with growing older, penny thought to herself as she shifted the weight from one foot to the other. there were fewer and fewer people to care about what you did with your life, and where you went at night when the streets were supposed to be deserted. then again, this sometimes turned out to be a blessing, because it meant worrying less people than one was probably used to worrying in their life. at least, this was the case with penny and her mother. they had no one else, and so when penny had been accepted to college, it was almost cruel to think that she was so willing to embark on this next chapter in her life when it meant leaving her mother behind. and though mrs. archer had told her daughter to go, penny knew that a part of her was probably wishing she had stayed behind to keep her company.
that was one of the things on her mind that night, the guilt of having left her mother behind. it still felt wrong, and as much as penny hated herself for doing it, a part of it also felt right. was that so wrong? that she should want something for herself, just this once in her life? she didn't know, but it was beginning to eat her alive, until she could no longer stand it.